Saturday, April 28, 2018

Robert's passing

   I was a bit shocked when Betty told me that Robert had died. Although I hadn't seen him for some time, I was still fully that he had touched me. I just needed to remember.
   Because I hadn't been at the park for quite some time, I must have thought at some recent time that he might not still be alive. Still, the news surprised me. I imagine that although we might fully expect someone to die, perhaps even anticipate it, its difficult to fathom it.
   I  remember being at my father's deathbed in the hospital in Oneonta, New York, waiting for his last breath. I was shocked when it happened.
   When Betty stopped me as we walked in opposite directions around Stow Lake, I felt guilty for thanking her for telling me about Robert. I meant to thank her for informing me, but it felt afterwards like I was thanking her for his death. It's hard to know what to say when you're told of a passing of a person important to someone else; it's confusing when it's someone that you knew only a bit.
   Robert was a man that I talked with only for short periods of time when I had finished my morning walk in the park. He would sometimes tell me a not-very-funny joke, and honestly, I can't really remember much of what else we would speak of. Still, I was moved that he would come out of his car to talk with me as I neared. I don't know what we had in common that might have formed a bond between us, but I felt one, and I believe he did, too.
   Once, I wanted to hug him, but didn't. I don't really understand why I felt so close to him, but he felt like a family member that had always accepted me fully. The news of his death reminded me that I miss him.

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