I've been wanting to write about Gene Clark for some time now, but have always felt somewhat overwhelmed when I think of how to describe how I feel about his music. While I don't love all of his material equally, there are some songs which I find so hauntingly sad, that I just want to listen to them over and over again, to be able to live in that pain for a while.
Gene Clark has been written about by many, and there is always talk of his stage fright, fear of flying, and his alcoholism and drug addiction. Of course, there are many reasons why people develop the emotional responses to things that they do, but for me, even though he was said to be unpredictable and difficult to work with, it seems like Gene Clark was just too fragile. When I listen to the song, "With Tomorrow", and I hear the opening guitar, how it seems that the notes are just barely able to be pulled out, it seems the entire structure is in danger of collapsing. I don't find this to be necessarily true of all of his songs, but there is always a bittersweet quality, a crushing vulnerability.
Gene Clark died at the age of 46 of a heart attack, one year younger than I am now. After years of health problems, he had undergone surgery three years earlier, where he had much of his stomach and intestines removed, those areas having been irreparably damaged by ulcers. It's as if the world had infected his body, and removing it proved difficult, and not without complications.
With hindsight at my disposal, it seems that Gene Clark's voice carried with it his past resentments and regrets, current fears and anxieties, and his body's future pains. That's a heavy load for a voice to carry.
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